We
are in the second week of our current sermon series called “Parenthood”.
We
said last week that: “God’s Word provides clear guidance on how to raise
children to be full of faith and focused on Him.”
As
followers of Jesus we have a responsibility to search the Word of God, and see
what it has to say on any issue and apply what it has to say to our lives, and
parenting is no exception, and God’s word provides clear guidance on how to raise
children to be full of faith and focused on Him.”
Does
anyone remember the key scripture for this series? We were going to memorize
Proverbs 22:6 which says: “Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he
will not turn from it.” (NIV)
I
want to mention once again that if you are not a parent, never will be a
parent, or you are a parent but your children have moved out from your house,
please don’t tune me out.
There is something
in today’s message that God wants you to apply in your life, so I want to
encourage you to tune in, because the Word of God has the power to change your
life!
This morning we
are going to examine three principles that never change in all of our relationships,
especially parenting, because quite honestly, there are many things that change
in our philosophy of parenting.
ILLUSTRATION- When our oldest daughter,
Emma, was born, we gave her a pacifier, or as we called it, her sookie.
Whenever
Emma dropped her sookie on the ground, we made sure to find some running water
and make sure it was all cleaned off before we put it back in her mouth.
When
Erica was born, she too had a sookie, only whenever it fell on the ground, we
dusted it off and shoved it back in her mouth….
Things change as
you parent, but I want to give you 3 principles that will never change in any
and all of our relationships.
We’re going to
look at an encounter that Jesus had with some children and learn from His
approach, so I invite you to look with me at Mark 10:13-16:
“One day some
parents brought their children to Jesus so he could touch and bless them. But
the disciples scolded the parents for bothering him.
14 When Jesus saw what was happening, he was
angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t
stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children.
15 I tell you the
truth, anyone who doesn’t receive the Kingdom of God like a child will never
enter it.”
16 Then he took the
children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and blessed them.”
(NLT2)
In this story
showing Jesus encountering little children, we see the first unchanging principle
of relationships: Appropriate Touch.
Look again at
verse 13: “People
were bringing little children to Jesus to have him touch them…” (Mark
10:13a, NIV)
ILLUSTRATION- Some of us may subscribe to
the bad preacher channel and have seen people lined up to receive “a touch”
from the TV preacher, and when these people finally get to the preacher, he
places his hands on their head and yells: “BE
HEALED IN JESUS’NAME”; and then the preacher
gives them a big push and they fall backwards.
That’s
not what’s happening here. We know this based on the Greek word that is
translated as touch. It is haptō and
it means: “to
touch, hold, embrace, handle.”
Jesus
very carefully and lovingly held the little children that were brought to Him.
He wasn’t forceful with them, He didn’t
banish them off to one side while He talked to their parents; Jesus took the
children in His arms and loved on them.
ILLUSTRATION- I read this week a little
about King Frederick II, who was at one time the Holy Roman Emperor.
King
Fred tried a very weird experiment. He wanted to know what language a child
would speak if that child was never, ever spoken to from the time he or she was
born.
(The rationale behind this was to see what kind of language was imparted
to Adam and Eve by God...)
He
had 50 babies brought into his laboratory and had his assistants feed them,
change them, bathe them, but they were not allowed to show affection or
emotion.
They
were never allowed to do all the things adults do with babies when they hold
themà no “googogaga”;
nor was there any cuchi-chuci-coo. None of that was allowed to take place.
The
experiment didn’t work at all, because within 1 year, all 50 babies died,
because they didn’t have the touch that was important to them. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frederick_II,_Holy_Roman_Emperor; and PH sermon #2)
Jesus set the example for all relationships,
especially the parenting relationship; there needs to be appropriate touch in our relationships.
Now,
in today’s day and age, you have to be careful with who you touch, why you
touch, and when you touch, but even still, for an important relationship to
survive, it needs a certain amount of appropriate touch.
Let’s
look at one more Scripture verse related to this thought. Flip back a couple of
chapters to Mark 6:56:
“Wherever he (Jesus) went—in villages, cities, or the countryside—they (the people) brought the sick out to the marketplaces. They—the
people-- begged
him—Jesus-- to let the sick touch at least the fringe of his robe, and
all who touched him were healed” (Mark 6:56, NLT2)
WOW!
There is something
incredible-- I’ll even say therapeutic-- that happens when appropriate touch
takes place.
And appropriate touch is the
first unchanging principle of relationships and parents, this means embracing
your kids, wrestling with your kids.
Non-parents, it means
engaging in a hand-shake or a gentle touch on the back with people you are
close to.
Appropriate touch goes a
long way to ensuring the success of a relationship.
The 2nd
unchanging principle of relationships is Abundant Time.
ILLUSTRATION-
One of my university professors once told us how people spell love. He said
love is spelled: T-I-M-E.
Now,
I don’t profess to be an awesome speller, but I think this is absolutely true.
Love is spelled T-I-M-E.
My
kids don’t want nor need a new Blue Jays hat as much as they need me to spend
time with them.
Your
spouse doesn’t need you to solve all their problems as much as they need you to
listen to them.
Any
other relationship that you have doesn’t need a solution as much as it needs
your presence.
I’m not
making this stuff up! Look at our text: “People were bringing little children to Jesus to have him
touch them, but the disciples rebuked them.”
(Mark 10:13, NIV)
The
disciples thought that Jesus was way too busy to spend time with all of the
children, so they blasted the parents of
these children; “don’t bother Him” they said, “He’s too busy”.
But
I’ll have you notice Jesus’ response found in verse 14:“When Jesus saw what was happening, he was
angry with his disciples. He said to them, “Let the children come to me. Don’t
stop them! For the Kingdom of God belongs to those who are like these children.”
(Mark 10:14, NLT2)
Jesus
wasn’t too busy for children! He wanted them to come to Him. In fact, Jesus
used the children to teach us about the need to change and become like
children in order to receive the kingdom of God.
Jesus
wasn’t too busy for these children, but sometimes we are too busy for our kids,
our spouses, our friends…
If Jesus wasn’t too busy to
spend time with important people—and this passage clearly tells us that
children are important people—don’t you think we should follow His example?
ILLUSTRATION- Please understand friends,
that I’m still working on this myself.
There are many days when I come home from work exhausted, and all I want
to do after supper is sit on the couch and watch the ballgame.
But then my
little girl will come and look at me in the eye, almost as if to say- Dad, will you play with me?
So,
instead of sitting on the couch, I’ll suggest we play a game together, or I’ll
go to my room and get my dart gun and chase them around the house.
Church
I don’t always get this right, but I’m working on it because if Jesus had time for important
people, I need to find time for the important people in my life as well.
ILLUSTRATION- A reporter once asked Billy
Graham an interesting question. He said: “if you
had your life to do all over again, what would you do differently?”
Here’s
what Billy Graham didn’t say: “I would have done 10 more crusades; or I would
have written another New York Times best seller. He said: “I would have spent more time with my children.” (PH.
Sermon #2)
Who
is the important person in your life? Is it your spouse? Is it your children?
Is it your parents? Is it your close friend?
Whoever it is, I want to encourage you
to spend time with them, because love is spelled T-I-M-E.
And
the third unchanging
principle of relationships is: Encouraging
talk.
Look
at Mark 10:16: “Then
he took the children in his arms and placed his hands on their heads and
blessed them.” (NLT2)
What
a powerful verse! Not only did Jesus touch the children, but He blessed them;
He encouraged them; He spoke positive words into their life.
Pastor
Craig Groeschel once said: “One of the most important things we can do for our
children is to speak words of life rather than words of death” (PH sermon #2)
ILLUSTRATION- One of the many things that I
will always remember about my Father is how often he told me that he was proud
of me.
Whether it was
in an email, through a text, on the phone or in person, my dad would always
take the time to bless me by telling me how proud he was of me and my family.
ILLUSTRATION- This past week, Emma brought
home her French test and showed it to me. Her eyes were sparkling as she said
to me: “Daddy; this is the best mark I’ve
ever gotten in French!”
I
grabbed her and gave her a big hug and a kiss and told her I was very proud of
her.
ILLUSTRATION- Erica had a dance recital
this past Wednesday night, and before she left, I sat her down on my knee and
told her that I was very proud of her and that I knew she would do an awesome
job.
You know what
she did? She leaned into my neck and gave me a great big hug.
Dear
Church, there are days that I don’t always get this part right either, but on
those days, my loving wife will remind me about the power of my words when I
speak to my children, because my words will impact them forever.
ILLUSTRATION- Do you remember the old
saying: Sticks and Stones will break my bones,
but words will never hurt me?"
That's a lie! Words have the power to hurt us way more than sticks and
stones ever will.
So when you speak, are you using life
giving words, or life killing words?
There
is only one place in the entire Bible that the audible voice of God is recorded
as speaking to Jesus.
There is no doubt that God spoke to
Jesus more than once, but only once is the conversation recorded for us, and
that can be found in Matthew 3:17.
Jesus
had just come out of the water after His baptism: “And a voice from heaven said, "This is my
Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased." (Matthew 3:17, NIV)
God
shouted down from heaven: “That’s My Boy! I Love Him! I’m proud of Him!”
I
wonder how many of us need to follow our Heavenly Father’s example in our
relationships?
Which one of the
unchanging principles do we need to apply to the important people of our lives?
Every
relationship that we have will thrive if we apply these principles, but our
relationships will suffer tremendously if one, two, or all three of these
principles are missing, so which one do you need to apply to your life?
Do you need to spend Abundant
time with the important people in your life?
Do you
need to speak encouraging words to the important people in your life?
Do you
need to use appropriate touch in your relationships?
What
principle do you need to work on? Maybe it’s all three?
Maybe you need to wrestle with your
grand-children? Maybe you need to bless a friend, whose been having a hard
time. Maybe you need to take someone out to dinner this week…
If
you need to make some changes in your relationships, I’m going to ask you pick
up, and fill out, a response card off the alter.
Each
card has the three relationship principles on them, and if you need to work on
one, two, or all three of these principles, do so one step at a time.
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